Discoveries:
Today I discovered that sometimes you need a theme in order to properly tackle your day. I coined this motto at age 26 after a tough series of consecutive sub par sales months . I am a winner, I hate to lose more than I like to win so missing my sales quota was not an option. Then it hit me, instead of haphazardly approaching my day with the blind optimism of a teenager on their first day of summer vacation I decided to start planning my day. Back then I would take a plan sheet of paper and tally up all the things I wanted to accomplish, experience, enjoy and conquer for the day. I would choose tasks that were a stretch to complete, nothing easy. With each passing day I got more and more done. I felt in control of all that I could control on my own. I was focused and had a clear end in sight. All I had to do was work backwards and figure out the steps needed in order to reach my goal. I said all that to say this, have a theme for your day. If you are having a brain fart today and you can't figure out some appropriate themes to choose from let me help you. Look at each bullet point below and challenge yourself to live at least one day next week with said theme. Here you go:
Possible Themes For Your Day:
Feel Loved
I am the Super Sports Fan
Cleaning out my Closet (Both of them)
Experience Art
Music for your Soul
A Good Laugh
The Social Atmosphere
High Points:
I rescued my son last night. At 2am I woke up to screams of holy terror. My three year old had wet the bed and was plagued with a nightmare. "It's a monster outside," is all he said. Naturally there are no monsters but it is possible to be plagued with demons or look out the window, at 3 years old and see the very worst parts of life. Every cloud looks like the devil and every shadow can feel like it is haunting you. Well, being the great dad that I am, I rescued him. First, I gave him a big hug and turned on all of the lights . Once he was able to see that there were no immediate threats other than a few loose toys laying around he calmed down, then I gave him a big bear hug and told him that everything would be okay. The fact that he was drenched in urine didn't matter to me, that's what washers and dryers are for. Then I gave him a quick bath, found him a new pair of jammies and then I let him sleep in the bed with me. He latched on immediately and within minutes he was fast asleep. He thought I warded off the make believe monsters, I was just being a good dad.
Low Points:
I didn't finish all of my soup. I know it seems like a small thing to you but it is a huge deal to me. I grew up with humble beginnings, leaving perfect;y good soup in the bowl was a no-no's. Food costs too much to let it go to waste. The morsels I left in the bowl were enough to start a riot in some third world countries and I just let it sit there. Then I thought about it, perhaps its not about the soup or the bowl but about indulging in my appetites. Grant it, I could have maxed it all but I chose to leave it there. I have recently been presented with many choices that are similar and it will be up to me and only me to decide if I will eat the soup or leave it in the bowl.
Daily Insanity:
Four words: Crooked Lace Front Weaves....need I say more. Ladies, if I see another sideways hairline on your forehead when you know your hair doesn't grow like that I am going to ask you to climb up the side of the highest building you see, jump off and kill ya'self....Okay, I don't really want you to kill yourself (Sorry mama, I had to do it!)
Question
When it comes to difficult conversations, what is the best way to have them?
John R Williams
Author/Radio Host/Filmmaker/Marketing Executive
3 comments:
I'm plagued with seeing crooked lace fronts everyday. I'm just glad someone other than me can't stand it.
As for your question, I think it's best just to say what you have to say in a respectful and intelligent way. Beating around the bush just makes you seem timid and unsure about the resolve. Plus, it insults the intelligence of those involved if you aren't being straight forward by implying that either you or the other person is too immature to handle the content of the discussion.
I enjoyed this post, specifically your approach to the day.
If Rome wasn't built in day, you need to understand we will never be immediately absolved of our problems in one day either. Try to divide the (conversations) up over the week or the month or in certain cases over the year, if its that important to you. When you think about it most of our problems took an exponential amount of time to build up, because for whatever reasons we didn't address it on day 1. So why not focus on just addressing the issues so we can get on the same page. Once you get over the initial shock of what your partner is telling you, a solution to your problems is inevitable. It could be you two discover new ways of support to meet each other needs, however you also might realize that you need to abandon the relationship and its finally run its course. Either way, once we identify a solution we have to be realistic with ourselves to live with it. The most important part (ladies please) is limit your conversation to only 1 hour. I hardly agree with anything in the corporate world, with exception to having meetings: If you can't accomplish what you set out to do in 1 hour, it can't be done. Don't you hate it when meetings go on longer than they have too? I was just in a 4 hour meeting this past Friday about "Redefining Rigor in the 21st Century Classroom." Trust me it was much, much more boring as it sounds (especially after an hour, people just began repeating the same shit). My principal needs their ass whooped for that kind nonsense on a Friday! So anyway, remember if it can't be accomplished what you set out to do in an hour, no problem: Tomorrow isn't a small suburb in Georgia.
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